I remember one of the main struggles I had when going through infertility was wondering what was wrong with me. Millions of women had been able to conceive children before, what did I do wrong? This led to me searching for every way possible that explained what I was doing wrong and needed to do or not do to become pregnant.
- I ate exclusively from recipe books that promoted fertility
- I didn’t drink coffee or alcohol
- I worked out, but not too hard, which basically meant I walked a lot
- I stopped coloring my hair
- I tried going to fertility doctors and following all of their advice
- I watched my ovulation cycle like a hawk
You name it, I probably tried it, it’s just been a few years so I don’t remember everything I tried anymore, just the “highlights.” All the while being ashamed of it because I felt like something was wrong with me. I believe most women who are going through infertility try to hide it the best they can, feeling ashamed that they aren’t able to conceive.
If you are going through infertility, listen to me when I say, “there is nothing wrong with you!”
I don’t have much credibility though, so let’s turn to someone who does. God. God did not make a mistake when he created you and there is NOTHING you can do that will keep God’s love away from you. His ways are above our ways and his understanding is above our understanding. I do believe in doing what we can to help with what we are facing, but ultimately the rest is in his hands.
Say this psalm out loud today. “I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Psalm 139:14
Hold on to his promises.
Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
You’ve probably started already reaching out to others if you are reading this or writing a blog of your own. I encourage you to keep doing that and to see if there is a support group in your area that can help such as Resolve or Celebrate Recovery. When you can see and talk to other women, it opens up doors and I hope will help you as much as it did for me. Of the group that I was apart of 2 years ago, 9 out of the 10 women have had babies since then. A group of miracle babies that we get to celebrate and I’ve formed life long friendships with.
Let me know if you need help finding a support group in your area.